Maplewood's Ibtihaj Muhammad Wields a Saber, Sharp Story in 'Proud'
By Jacqueline Cutler
"Proud: My Fight for an Unlikely American Dream"
By Ibtihaj Muhammad
(Hachette Books, 288 pp, $27)
As if the torments of being a teenager weren't hard enough, being devout made it even more challenging.
All teens fret over whether they belong and with whom they should hang out. For Maplewood's Ibtihaj Muhammad, it was even tougher.
The first Muslim-American to medal at the Olympics, her hijab made her stand out and people were often less than welcoming.
She recounts how teachers stumbled over her name. Classmates stared at her headscarf. Even friends questioned her, constantly. Why couldn't she sleep over? Why couldn't she wear shorts?
She was different, and different is not something most teenagers want to be.
But then the Maplewood teen started fencing, and winning medals - all the way to the bronze one her team took at the 2016 Olympics.
It all came down to having the confidence to "show up to the party even when an invitation was never extended."
Her book comes out on July 24 in two versions, the young-adult one subtitled "Living My American Dream" and the less positive subtitle on the adult version - "My Fight for an Unlikely American Dream."
The adult one is more open, explaining it was a struggle from the start.
Her parents had worked very hard - her father as a cop, her mother as a teacher - to move their growing family out of Newark. As soon as they settled in Maplewood, they enrolled their children in public school and pushed them to excel.
But even in that diverse suburb, Ibtihaj felt out of place. When 9/11 happened, she was in high school. The teachers immediately sequestered the Muslim boys in a separate classroom. For their protection, the school later said.
Who are you really worried about, Ibtihaj wondered.
Although her parents always insisted their children play sports, it posed a special problem for their daughters. They had to dress modestly. Fencing was the answer. It came with a head-to-toe uniform, and headgear big enough to go over her hijab.
It appealed to Ibtihaj in other ways, too. It was fast, competitive and one-on-one.
Ibtihaj Muhammad always perseveres, which earned her a bronze medal in the Olympics. She also speaks out about immigration issues and started a clothing line.
Plus, when the students put on their protective masks, she was finally on that most elusive of playing fields - an even one.
Once fully in gear, "I was just one more Columbia High School fencer, not the Muslim girl or the black girl," she writes. "Even though I was the only Muslim on the team, and one of only a handful of people of color, I always felt safe and that I was exactly where I belonged."
The team made state championships, and Ibtihaj went to the Junior Olympics.
She earned great grades while fencing, and the combo won her a hefty scholarship to Duke University.
Yet once at the elite university, she encountered teammates who made racist jokes, and roommates who wondered why she skipped keggers. Ibtihaj felt lost. For a while she even gave up fencing.
And it was more depressing to return home after graduation and see job offers disappear as soon as people saw her hijab. She ended up working at a dollar store.
Finally, Ibtihaj sought out her old high school coach, Frank Mustilli. She didn't know what to do next. Go back to fencing, he told her. Go back to competing, and aim for the Olympics.
It took years of training and qualifying tournaments. But when America's team was chosen, Ibtihaj was on it, wielding her saber.
The real struggle, though, was just beginning. Ibtihaj’s teammates shunned her. The coach ignored her. But she pushed herself, the way she always had.
And when the 2016 Olympics were over, she stood there proudly in her hijab - and her medal.
For a woman who risked so much, Ibtihaj Muhammad is sometimes cautiously close-mouthed.
Now 32, she mentions no friends outside her family. She is guarded on these pages. Though it's clear she abides by religious edicts that apply only to women, how does she feel about it? It would be fascinating to know more.
Since the Olympics, Ibtihaj has been busy - talking to young athletes, starting a fashion line of conservatively tailored women's clothes, inspiring her own Barbie doll. And, most important to her, she's become an activist, on issues like race and immigration.
She doesn't expect an easy ride. Nothing ever has been. And this time, "the prize is an America that truly respects all its citizens," she writes. "And that is worth more than any medal." – nj.com
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